TikTok is crowded with women advocating for the “boy sober” trend. The trend advocates for swearing off men and embracing the single life.
It all started after Hope Woodard, 26, from New York, grew tired of being ghosted.
“I come from a long line of women who have never been able to live without men,” Hope told Cosmopolitan UK. “We have to stop the cycle.”
The rules are simple: No dating apps, no dates, no exes, and no situationships.
“[The boy sober trend] is born out of women’s frustrations with dating,” says dating coach Eimear Draper. “The administration of dating apps, endless messaging that goes nowhere, the bad behaviours like ghosting, breadcrumbing, etc.
“There is a general sense of dating fatigue and a feeling of lack of effort from men which seems to be leading to trends like this and the phrase “the bar is in hell” on TikTok,” she says.
While being boy sober can help women release the stress of dating fatigue and get back into the right mindset before jumping into the dating scene, Eimear urges caution. “It can become a defence mechanism that could lead to isolation,” she says. After all, young women in London seem to be the loneliest group in the capital, according to The Belonging Forum.
But the boy sober trend doesn’t have to equate to loneliness. It is about women lifting each other up and making connections.
The movement resonates with Odd One Out’s mission: to normalise the act of doing things solo, because being alone doesn’t mean being lonely.
To help you embrace the boy sober lifestyle, here are five of the best ways to enjoy going around London as a solo woman in true Odd One Out fashion.
The Lonely Girls Club
Despite the name, the women in this club are far from lonely. Four to seven times a month, the organisation brings women together through walks, dinners book clubs and more. On its website, the club specifies that the events are “designed for you to attend solo”, with 95 per cent of attendees coming alone.
How to join: Sign up for The Lonely Girls Club newsletter or Facebook Community to register for
upcoming events.
Sunday strolls with Katie Morton
Hailing from sunny Florida, influencer and former Bachelor star Katie Morton moved to London in 2022 and began hosting walks through the capital’s various parks in order for women to exercise and make friends. As an expat, Katie organised these walks to create a family of supportive women from all backgrounds.
How to join: Most walks take place on Sunday mornings at 10am. Keep an eye on Katie’s Instagram for upcoming schedules.
Kenwood Ladies’ Pond
After being introduced in the 17th and 18th centuries as reservoirs to meet London’s demand for water, The Hampstead Heath bathing ponds were repurposed for swimming mainly by men, until, in 1926, one pond was designated as a women-only space. The Kenwood Ladies’ Pond has been a haven for all women with a passion for swimming, providing a safe place for women to be comfortable in their own skin as they jump into the cold water and sunbathe.
How to join: Slots are open for booking at noon every Monday via Eventbrite for just £4,70.
London Rollergirls
Whether you sign up for a beginner’s skating session or watch the roller derby team compete, this group of women challenges one another to be the best version of themselves through sport. If you’re looking to blow off some steam, this might be the club for you.
How to join: You can volunteer, attend a game or sign up for lessons on the website.
Bonus: Get the VINA app
Sometimes, meeting other women is half the battle. Described as the Tinder for (girl)friends, this app’s mission is to give women the tools they need to form their own community through empowerment, support and connection.
How to join: You can download the app from the VINA website.
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