Looking for some hot and sexy specialist parties in London; whether you are into strippers, BDSM, whips and chains, being dominated, or queer parties; Powder has created an alluring and exciting guide to some of the hottest nightlife London has to offer. We hope this directs you to the perfect venue for you, whatever your fetish or fantasy may be.
But first! Before Powder brings you in on the best kink clubs in London, we want to ensure you approach these spaces in a respectful and safe way.
We spoke to Sex Educator and Ambassador for The Cage. co Veronica Saad to get a better understanding of BDSM, and so we could make sure you guys are physically and mentally prepared before entering the world of BDSM. The cagé.co is a friendly, kink-positive BDSM community, bringing together like-minded people. The Cage. Co is a safe space offering blogs, chat rooms, and events all over the world.
Now let’s get educated, I asked Veronica Saad some questions; starting with the basics.
What is BDSM?
“The acronym stands for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism, and masochism.”
“I think it’s important to note that although BDSM can seem dark and mysterious at its heart, it is all about self-exploration and enjoyment, think of it as play for adults, a way for adults to dive into their fantasies, explore their depths and have fun.”
As a beginner; where would I begin?
“If you are not sure your interests, or how to be involved that’s fine, take your time and feel comfortable.”
“I recommend finding a community that can offer solid information and support. I work for the cage and it really is a great community of thousands of people from all over the world, you can chat with them, and ask questions. And remember that although we have loads of experienced members, many of them are going to be new to it all.”
What are BDSM rules?
“Just like rules in other areas of life, BDSM rules are anything that are expected of someone; rules to do something or rules to not do something. BDSM rules can be sexual but can also be simply practical. They can be for excitement or for general well-being. But most importantly they should be personal to your relationship and be agreed upon by all parties, add value to your dynamic and be enforced and regularly revisited.”
Can you give an example of BDSM rules?
“One example of BDSM rule might be prohibiting a submissive from drinking alcohol during the work week or expecting a submissive to kneel at the door when welcoming you home.”
How does the dominant come up with rules for BDSM:
“The best way is to treat it like a negotiating point with your submissive partner, sit down and have a discussion. Things like ‘what rules would you find hot? What rules do they have the time for? What rules will you be able to enforce?’ But I think the most important thing to consider is what rules are adding to the relationship instead of just becoming busy work.”
“Creating rules will take time and likely evolve as you go along.”
You mentioned that BDSM was for consenting adults only, could you share more on consent and how consent is ensured?
“Consent is integral to BDSM. The basic tenants of sex are the same in the world of kink as they are everywhere else. Your consent is required, you can revoke that consent at any time, and you cannot consent to something you are not fully aware of. Unless discussed, consent is never a given. Just because a dominant is a dominant does not mean they are automatically owed any special treatment.” All interactions even the most basic must be consented to ahead of time.”
What about group events?
“Consent is still required but it may work kind of differently. There are places you may go online or off where certain behaviour is expected. You consent to expected behaviour and protocols by attending or going to the event. But this does not override your ability to say no or leave the space. If any activity is not comfortable, consent can be revoked at any moment.”
Veronica explains that “when people start to enter the world of kink there is a lot of focus to the physical aspects of it: spanking, bondage, chastity, cages and more. Because of this, the mental aspects are something people develop later in their kink journey.”
What are some mental kinks in BDSM?
Mental bondage: “think of mental bondage like the exact bondage you know and love but without the need for any gear. Instead, mental bondage focuses on the bottom obeying a command to stay in place.”
Hypnosis: “In most portrayals a hypnosis professional talks a person into a hypnotic state where they may be more suggestible to ideas or better able to recall previous events. This type of activity can be done with an erotic or kink slant as well. Think orgasms, a deeper headspace, or a deeper immersion into roleplay roles.”
Roleplay: “Playing pretend can be an extremely erotic way to explore your scenes. Especially if you have always had kinks for different scenarios, like maybe prisoner/ guard, doctor/patient, props and gear make it easier to get immersed, but the role-play itself is entirely mental.”
Before we get into London Locations, here are some upcoming Cage. co events:
19/4/23 – ‘Cannabis, intimacy and kink’. This a stimulating and informative class on various ways to include your cannabis consumption with your sex and kink life!
20/4/23 – A dungeon dating event – introduction to impact play and restraints @ Centair Studios Hackney, 256 Hackney Road, London E2 7SJ.
22/4.23 – Unruly – a social for fat people in BDSM – unruly is a space for fat people involved or interested in the kink scene to come together and socialise @ The Hackney Den, Dalston N16B 8BX.
Now for the Locations.
THE BOX:
Entering The Box, brace yourself for the unruly and unknown.
You will never experience the same thing twice at The Box, they do different shows on different nights.
I spoke to four friends who had all experienced a night out at the box on different occasions. Firstly, I spoke to Farah Thorndycraft, (22, Coulsdon).
Farah tells Powder that the night she visited the box “this guy pulls out a dildo from his ass, and it was like covered in blood; it was so gross…then we had someone shaving their willy and their balls on stage like their pubes were going over everyone in the front row.” ”Then they took off their dressing gown and they had like massive tits.”. the show certainly didn’t stop there; Farah then witnessed this guy on stage “who had a load of umm like is dwarfs the right word to use, in gimp suits like attacking this guy, oh it was so weird.”
She ends by letting us know that she feels like her experience “was quite tame to what everyone else had experienced there.”
“Box is brazy” Max Morell, (23, Tooting) tells us; “I saw a lady put different colour paint in her … then squirt it out onto shirts and people were buying the t-shirts”
Finally, Seshi (23, Bristol) adds that his experience at The Box “was pretty mad”. “Basically, this trans person comes on stage and starts doing a strip tease around a toilet. Then they reached into the toilet and started rubbing fake shit on their tits. Then they grabbed a plunger and started fucking their ass with it lol. It was kinda fucked”
TORTURE GARDEN:
Before even bothering to attend a Torture Garden event, please leave any bad attitudes at home
Torture Garden is the biggest and best when it comes to fetish parties, hosting events monthly in London, and also in their franchises worldwide. Make sure you are dressed to impress; don’t be scared to show off some flesh and leather is a must. The underground dungeons are filled with dominatrixes; who are not afraid to give you a whipping if that’s what you’re into.
KLUB VERB OTEN:
Provider of contemporary sex-positive spaces.
“KLUB VERBOTEN launched in 2016 and is a provider of contemporary sex-positive spaces. Provider of contemporary sex-positive spaces. Our roots lie in the spatial, sonic, and visual exploration of BDSM + fetish practices,”
There are rules, safeguarding, and dress codes. Make sure to follow.
KILLING KITTENS
‘Liberating women worldwide, Killing Kittens is a shame-free community for dating, sex ed and so much more (Killing Kittens.com)
“A bold and empowering brand that spoke to sexually adventurous women, men and couples who were looking for more. Killing Kittens famous hedonistic events challenge society’s shameful stigmas around sex. – ‘(https://wearekk.com)
BIZARRE EVENTS – Walthamstow, London
‘Fetish.com’ claims bizarre events organise ‘London’s most extreme fetish sex parties, whether you’re a lover of latex, a fan of flogging or a wet and wild water sports enthusiast”; it seems like bizarre events might be the perfect hosts for you.
Stick Club
Embrace your naughty side, meet like-minded people with the same kinks as you, and party the night away in a safe and sexy place.