Kate and Mariam interview Goldsmiths students to find out the tea about London nightlife!Show less
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Author: Mariam Balogun Etti
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Overheard by the Bartender
Travel to the streets of Peckham to find out the gossip behind the bar from a bartender based in Central London.
It’s no secret that not all club nights are welcoming to everyone. so, maverick organisers are hitting back with niche events catering to intersectional communities, reclaiming the scene. Here’s our round up of the best club events for the queer and ethnic community.
LGBTQ+ and Ethnic communities struggle to find places where they feel welcome and can party and drink without the stress of being othered because of who they are and how they present.
It is rare to find spaces that are controlled and populated by members of the community, when u live within a homophobic, transphobic and racist society (no matter how hidden). Members of the community continuously find themselves casted out from mainstream society and are forced to hide themselves for the sake of their own safety.
Even the clubs that solely exist for the queer communities are either infiltrated by opportunists or demonised by white cis-hetro men, or they exist for the white male gay audience. When your existence is debated and not seen as appropriate dinner talk – by a major proportion of society, there is seldom somewhere to party and for total release.
So, to piss them off and provoke them more so than before, here is a list of the top five LGBTQBIPOC-friendly clubs that have not been infiltrated by white cis-hetero males and are dominated by the queer trans lesbian ethnic members of the community. Here is to having what is seen as taboo fun.
HUNGAMA
This East-London based queer alternative night is putting the south Asian queer scene on the map, mixing Bollywood and clubbing culture into a euphoric blend. A vital pillar in South Asian queer representation in the music scene since 2017, the energy is mad and feels like a home away from home, a perfect place for community and a perfect alternative to the overly white atmosphere that is the mainstream queer club scene. An ultimate celebration of queerness, party and creativity, the venue is always changing so make sure to check out their Instagram for future events.
Gal Pals
Celebrating all things femme, trans and non-binary, Gal Pals nights are held in venues in London and Brighton and is strict about playing music by women, non-binary and trans musicians such as Arca, Kim Petras and Slayyter. what you have is a comfortable and fun experience where you can dance like nobody is watching and enjoy euphoric hedonism without the fear of being preyed on. According to fan Jaqueline Da-Silva, “I don’t feel judged how I present. You would always have at least one person flirting with you which is hilarious.”
JUICE LONDON
Juice London is the black LGBTQ+ party you will want to be at. It’s black-owned and features amazing DJs and music. A spectacular place to find yourself on a night in soho, the organisers run events and parties all year round and continuously uplift and support members of the Black LGBTQ+ communities. This is done most creatively by hosting LGBTBIPOC history events where you can party while learning a thing or two from prominent voices in the community.
LICK
Lick, an event formerly held once a month, is now a fully established venue located under the Vauxhall arches. This is not a place for cisgendered men – they are not allowed to enter. This is an exclusive, safe space reserved for any femmes and non-binary persons, who are finally offered the space to whine up on each other without fear of harassment and bigotry.
PXSSY PALACE
PXSSY PALACE is unapologetic. Screaming queer, with its inclusive club-night themes and all-round vibes, it is the place to be… if you can get tickets. It is always sold out since everyone rushes to attend its events, but for good reason. A haven for all women and femmes of colour to feel liberated and express themselves and their desires to musical backdrop of pure hits, a night at PXSSY PALACE promises to serve as a celebration of all things femme, trans, non-binary, queer and ethnic. Controversially but laughably in our favour, tickets are priced at £20 for LGBTQBIPOC persons, and £112.20 for straight cis-gendered men. Iconic.
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What Are You Smoking Tonight?
If Marlboro Gold was a man, and Lost Mary was found passed out on a park bench, what kind of people would they be? We asked Karis Hinds, Sainsbury’s employee of the decade who has sold thousands of packs and ‘pens in their time working behind the counter.
Smoking is cool again, apparently, so here is a list that matches personality types to their brand of fags.
From classics like B&H to the new funky fresh taste of Lost Marys, every brand attracts a certain kind of clientele – from blue collar scaffolders to east London interns – and everyone has a brand that reflects them. Gather round and read on to see if you can spot yourself.
Benson & Hedges Blue – ‘The simple classic.’
Here’s to the classic smoker. Those who choose B&H do it out of routine and comfortability. They are secure financially but have most likely never done anything out of the norm. Their choice to smoke this basic brand, and their choices in everything else like music and fashion are quite cookie cutter and inoffensive. Oasis‘s Noel and Liam Gallagher are known to have a go on this brand which says something about these smokers – just like your grandad, they’re safely uninteresting.
Marlboro Gold – ‘The fickle minded.’
For those who recently decided to commit to smoking but don’t want to acknowledge the risks. Or, alternatively, for those who are trying to wean themselves off. “I once asked a regular customer why they chose Golds and they answered, ‘They are quite light so it’s not as harmful as the others,’” Karis said. “They’re clearly in denial.”
Often you would see a younger person purchase these cop-outs – just like how they refuse to commit to lung cancer, they also can’t commit to their own sense of style and are usually a Molly-Mae or ASOS-man duplicate. No hate to them, though.
Lambert & Butler – ‘The *London accent* ‘alright, mate?’
The traditional, old school Brit who most likely voted for Brexit because they long for the good-old-days, when London was filled with true ‘Londoners’, none of that ‘ethnic crap’. You see them walk up to the counter dressed in the notorious polo, jeans and scaffolding boots combo; or in one of those Conservatives in a suit and tie, voice cracked from years of smoking and a lifetime of opposing left-wing politics. Nevertheless, you can always trust these guys to suggest a good spot to have a cheap pint.
Silk Cut – ‘The nomad.’
Silk Cuts are known for their elegant, minimalistic and sleek design – only on a rare occasion would someone ask for these. The people that smoke these are usually committed to finding a bit of culture wherever they go, choosing between Brick Lane’s best Vietnamese restaurants or actually back-packing through Vietnam. They’re artistic – not the annoying CSM-kind (IYKYK) – but the laid-back-dabbling-with-Buddhism kind.
Golden Virginia – ‘The standard rollie.’
A young lad who’s clearly got student loans to waste because this brand is NOT cheap. Enjoyment is always on the menu for them. Basically, the type of person who has been attending a festival every summer since the end of GCSEs: outfit-wise, you see them wearing a football top, straight-leg jeans with indoor shoes, calling themselves “lad-core” to the disdain of the rest of us. Chatty, easy going, and they always have good music recommendations. These guys are cool to be friends with – just don’t ever date one.
Vuse Vape – ‘The tech/finance guy’.
This popular brand of e-cigarette is usually tenderly in the palm of the one guy in the smoking area who won’t stop going on about how he lives in Clapham. Their job usually sounds make-believe and is a part of some tech or finance company that you have never heard of. There’s only so many times they can explain what consulting is before you lose your mind. Blokes like this are usually dripping in wearable tech, and own a ¾ Patagonia zip jacket.
Elf Bars – ‘The Gen Z-er.’
Last but not least, the infamous Elf Bar smoker. This brand is very popular for those born after 1998. It’s cheap, looks pretty, and tastes like one of your 5-a-day. They’re sweeping through the younger generation like cocaine in the ’80s. They have a keen eye for tends and fashion, with outward appearance as their number one concern. You usually see them sporting some TikTok trend they judiciously sourced on Depop.
Probably mentally ill and well-informed in politics thanks to their infographic-posting tendencies, they are quite a cool group of people who care about society and saving the planet. More power to them – but seriously, stop smoking those things, you have so much to live for.
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Carcinogenic Conversations
We asked the Reddit community to recount the weirdest and most interesting things they have overheard at the smoking area. As ever with the Internet, the answers do not cease to amaze.
Step outside any club, and you’re hit by a barrage of sounds and smells: the thumping bass of the music, the stench of Marlboro Gold mixed with watermelon vape, and the random snippets of conversation from the people gathered around you.
In this socially-beguiling setting, if you listen closely, you might hear some of the weirdest, most interesting, and Kafka-esque words exchanged between those you find yourself stood out there with.
From cancel-worthy confessions to absurd arguments, it is a goldmine for the nosiest of us that love the gab. Reddit users revealed the craziest things they have overheard: get ready for a glimpse into the weird and wonderful world of the nightclub smoker’s area.
1. "We've had sex twice and he forgot my name the second time. But I swear he is a nice person... and he is really peng..." - From a girl trying so hard to justify her relations with a dick-head to her group of friends. 2. "I get to go to the bar on Mondays, Thursdays and Saturdays; you can take Tuesdays, Fridays and Sundays, and then we'll alternate on Wednesdays." - A guy having a custody battle over the phone. 3. "It started off as pussy but now it's love." - A contemporary retelling of Jane Austen’s Lady Susan. 4. “Yeah, I’m depressed. Everybody is depressed-” *starts pointing like Oprah* “- you’re depressed, and you’re depressed, and you’re depressed, and…” - The best mental health campaign I have heard. 5. "I only rent my apartments to couples having extra-marital affairs because they never use the kitchen. And it's less overall wear and tear. There’s usually not anything above a size four of women's clothes in the wardrobe when I check." - Maybe Mao was right... 6. (In the thickest Bristolian accent they have ever heard): "No, she got fingered by Gomper 'coz she wanted a fag." 7. “Oi. Tits first. I ain't a slag!” - Apparently overheard while walking home, loudly declared by a pair of smokers down an alleyway. 8. "I don't know if this is the cocaine talking but aren't penguins just magical!" - Followed by 20 minutes of showing people pictures of penguins on their phone.
There it is, a compiled selection of the strangest and most hilarious things that Reddit users have overheard at a club smoking area.
Whether it is the vodka, the sounds, or the atmosphere, something about that space seems to bring out the innermost thoughts and confessions of club goers. It’s a reminder that even in the chaos, there’s always a chance for a moment of absurdity or to overhear the true business of the people around you.
So, the next time you are smoking outside the club, take a moment to eavesdrop – who knows what gems of conversation you might discover?
Have a burning overheard confession you'd like to share? Head on over to our Instagram (@pwdrzine) to spill. Anon pls.
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The Barman Shot Me Down
Drinking on the dance floor is akin to a ritualistic experience where we can shed our old selves and become someone new. Mariam and Kate took that journey one boozy night in Peckham and this is how it went.
There’s no doubt that as soon as you step into the club you’re going to experience something, a beautiful moment where everything comes together.
Moves flow, you ride the vibe of your fellow clubgoers, and you don’t want it to stop. Usually, that moment is facilitated by alcohol – tequila, rum, childish cocktails or, for the demons that walk among us, vodka.
We moan about queues, not bringing a jacket and the state of the gender-neutral bathroom, but alcohol and the club atmosphere can make all of these bearable…dare we say, even enjoyable. As the drinks drop, we subconsciously become different versions of ourselves, so we took this as a catalyst to document the booze-soaked psychological shifts on a night out to see how reality changes at the club.
Mariam’s account
Shot number one: Tequila I arrived very early so I’m currently cowering at the corner of the club drinking the tequila I smuggled in a rainbow flask hidden in my jacket. Even though I have student finance and I live at home, I’ll have to be inebriated to pay £9 for a single shot. There are only three positions to take so far: standing by the wall, prepping in the bathroom or at the bar seeking some Dutch courage. The scene is best described by the guys' style: straight leg jeans, either a branded fleece or a plain coloured shirt and trainers, the kind you would see on a self-proclaimed “creative director.” We are in Peckham, might I add. At this point, I’m feeling very self-aware and I’m not ready to go with the flow. The DJ is playing music that is actually danceable and I could see myself going nuts once the façade of confidence sets in. So, the goal is to get tipsy-cute and not properly pissed. We aren’t eighteen anymore so pissed and yaking is not the move. Shot number two: Tequila again. I’ve moved to the bathroom again where I met some nice girls. I look into the mirror to see if I feel the buzz. I do. Why do I find myself in the bathroom? It almost acts like a purgatory between real life and whatever the hell this is. That said, I feel the love in Peckham tonight. Slowly, the stress of young life is dissipating, the scene starts to feel friendly, and you are ready to buy your new-found friend a shot. At this moment, inflation doesn’t seem so bad. Getting ready to go back out there again, finally the tequila confidence is creeping its way through. Shot number three and four: Fuck-yeah tequila. I’m on the dance floor trying to type into my Notes app, whilst being ping-ponged between sweaty bodies. By now everybody is feeling it. Bodies, bodies, bodies backdrop the DJ’s hypnotic mixes and euphoric songs. I see people truly lose themselves in the music. COVID is a thing of the past as bodies grind on each other - they will soon be praying that they are attractive outside of the club lighting. I could try to struggle towards the front of the stage to feel the full effect of the sounds but no one would hear my excuse-mes. So I make the most of where I’m at, unsure of whether the liquid I feel on my back is sweat or someone’s vodka and Coke. Saturday nights are back. This is it, I have discovered the sweat spot of a spiritual experience before self-deprecation. Nothing says ecstasy like buying three shots of tequila for yourself and your friend. I am well and truly a different person right now. Eventually, I succumb to the gaze of a man dressed like all the other Peckham bros. Hopefully he’ll ask for my Instagram handle instead of my number. ‘Maybe I am not as socially inept as I thought,’ as I find myself engaging in conversations with strangers. Shot number five (drink safely): No more tequila. Time for McDonald’s. With the effects of the night wearing off, it's time for another bathroom trip - a sacred space where I break away from the clubland to collect myself and check in on how I’m really feeling. Where everything outside of clubland is moving a mile a minute and there is no opportunity for a pause, the zen I feel in this messy powder room is not known anywhere else.
Kate’s account
Shot number one: Two shots of silver tequila – shock to the system, but lowkey refreshing. The night begins with pre-drinks at my friend's house – two shots of Captain Morgan and a swig of vodka mixed with iced tea. As an improving lightweight, I am already the slightest bit buzzed. Fast forward to the queue outside the club, shivering with excitement and anticipating strutting into the club for tonight’s motive. My coat safely stowed away in the cloak room, the next stop is the bar. We arrive just in time as the party starts to get lit. My group of five take turns to pay for drinks as the alcohol gradually wears off. After our shots, we head to the middle of the packed and dance floor. My guard is up, my vision slightly blurring, but I am giggling and my body feels looser and ready to dance. After a few minutes, we decide to head to the bathroom in the stereotypical fashion of moving in a girl pack. But we backtrack as soon as Ice Spice’s In Ha Mood plays - to the dancefloor, quickly! Shot number 2: Obviously, another tequila shot (and an accidental shot of Wray & His Nephews). Forget the toilet right now. Back to the bar we go. Those shots were cool but I am too sober for this place. Another shot of tequila down, I start to feel blushed and buzzed, as a typical lightweight should be. I am then handed what I think is another tequila shot by my friend – it’s in fact a shot of Wray and His Nephews. I’m so gone that don’t notice that it doesn’t come with any salt or lime. Shot number 3: One last tequila shot – I promise! I tell myself one more shot for the night. At this point, it’s two in the morning, the current vibe is trap music and entranced boys congregate in a body-odour-infused mosh pit. Nauseated, my friends and I decide to find a booth to chill out, which turns into a power nap for three-fifths of us. I wake up to the music still blaring in my ears and my friend filming me, then we sing along to Banking on Me by Gunna. Once we’re all awake, it’s time for a cup of water and a loo break before we head back to Lewisham for much-needed recovery sleep. My friend’s couch, a refrigerated sandwich and more water await me in ends.
Bestie for the night, hairstylist, relationship guru and the love of your life.
Dear drunk girl I met in the club bathroom at Peckham Audio, The sisterhood that we created whilst exchanging Instagrams is one so strong it could never be replaced. Even though we will only DM each other to share the pictures that we took that night, clearly our temporary friendship means so much to me. Where are you now, I wonder? Do you also think about how you fixing my makeup and giving me the ‘You’re a bad bitch, f*k that guy’ talk would make me believe in love again? Because I do. Drunk girl I met in the club bathroom, the secrets that we shared I will carry to the grave, even if I don’t really remember them. Like a powder room version of Catholicism, all it took was a drunken ‘Sister, I have sinned’ for the weight to be lifted of my shoulders. We met on Saturday night and we will never meet again, but I will always be here to aid you so that you don’t yak all over your Depop Keren Miller boots and Miss Sixty skirt. What kind of friend would I be to let you ruin an outfit as stylish and meticulously sourced as yours? I watched as you braved the nausea, adjusted your mini skirt, and emptied your purse on the bathroom sink as if it was your personal vanity. Numerous beauty products flooding out, a reflection of modern day consumerism before my eyes. Whatever a person could possibly need you had it in your bountiful bag. Every aesthetic problem that I didn’t know I had, you so nicely pointed out was fixed before I could even ask, the big sister vibes you exuded that night were unforgettable. I could thank you again for the unconditional love and sisterhood that you shared that Saturday night. That night, you had a PhD in psychology, a living example that girls really can do it all. The humanitarian acts that you delivered rival that of the UN, and when people question the kindness of other women, I will simply point to you and beg them to head to the club to experience true selfless humanity. At 1 a.m., three shots and a pre-game in, I know that I will experience the magic of sisterhood from a drunk girl in the club bathroom.