‘I’ve got the keys to the kingdom’
Rebecca Lowrie, or the Sexual Alchemist, is a somatic sex therapist, meaning that her therapy is based on the body and action, rather than talking. Lowrie, 55, based in Gloucestershire, exclusively coaches men to address sexual and intimacy-related issues. This follows her training in Neotantra; a modern and Westernised version of tantra practice that focuses more explicitly on sex.
I’ve been in tears all afternoon; it’s the first day of having clients physically back in my office today. It’s been overwhelming, and overwhelmingly positive. Although I have managed relative normality during the pandemic – I work internationally, so Zoom was very much my workplace already – the connections I forge simply feel different in person. A lot of my work entails connecting to the energy and body language of my client, so a virtual session is never going to feel exactly like one in person. Imagine going to the cinema, versus seeing a play at the theatre; live sessions are more immediate, the energy transmission more direct. In a session, I use touch to stimulate an energy connection between us; I might hold your hands over your heart, or massage the hands. Touch can bring about a powerful shifting of energy, of perspective, of possibility.
I used to work with a range of clients of all genders and sexual identities, couples and singles alike, but I now solely practise my “sexual alchemy” on male-identifying clients. I specialise in highly intelligent men, usually in their early to mid-thirties, who have little to no sexual experience under their belt. Many have specific sexual issues, like improving their stamina or technique in bed, but most of the problems I address boil down to a lack of confidence, which stunts an ability to be intimate.
In order to treat intimacy, you need to feel comfortable and intimate with your clients; something I see as a privilege. That’s why it’s so fulfilling working face-to-face with my guys. This return to direct contact is a pleasure I never knew I would miss until it was gone, and tuning in energetically to a client’s body and system in person is something that I know I need to hold onto, reverentially. And what a simple pleasure to enjoy!